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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26109571">The Cavern of the Incarnate</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/nostalgic_breton_girl/pseuds/nostalgic_breton_girl'>nostalgic_breton_girl</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Azura - Freeform, Breton Nerevarine, Cavern of the Incarnate, Gen, Moon-and-Star, The Path of the Incarnate</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 06:41:32</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,355</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26109571</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/nostalgic_breton_girl/pseuds/nostalgic_breton_girl</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Lunette reaches the Cavern of the Incarnate, and has an existential crisis.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Cavern of the Incarnate</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I had determined to enter quickly, with the resolve that comes of unthinking courage; but when I beheld the Cavern, it was yet afternoon, and the door did not open to me.</p>
<p>            I had presumed, beforehand, that such a place would welcome me only at Azura’s hours: that was the riddle, and that was the way of this most particular of Daedric princes. But I had estimated a later arrival than this, had thought I saw the beginnings of a sunset, as I came down into the valley – I had not been waylaid, had been fortunate, and now I was early. And as the sun began its slow descent towards evening, I would have time to think, too much time.</p>
<p>            I sat outside the door, therefore, and waited.</p>
<p>            What should I find, within? and what part of this bizarre destiny would be fulfilled, in entering?</p>
<p>            Sul-Matuul had insinuated that I should speak with Azura; there had been mention of Moon-and-Star; the very name of the Cavern – that of the Incarnate – weighed heavy upon me. I did not doubt that this was a significant point upon my journey, that here I should be granted some definitive proof of what I was to become. Until now, I had been a mere quester – a remarkable one, but not one who felt she possessed anything beyond her own self, and who certainly did not feel as if inspired by supernatural forces, forces beyond what I understood. Now, I was in a between place, somewhere between <em>quester</em>, and –</p>
<p>            <em>Nerevar Incarnate</em>.</p>
<p>            What did it mean, to become the Nerevarine?</p>
<p>            I had not thought it would come so soon – still doubted that it would, until I looked behind, and saw the great closed doors, inscribed with symbols of Azura, no ordinary cavern – had not thought upon it in so much depth, as in those hours before the twilight...</p>
<p>            What could I understand, I who had been cast unwilling into this land and this task? who had intruded upon a tradition which I knew nothing about? a simple Cyrodiilic Breton, who would only ever be seen as an outlander? Why would I be chosen, among the Dunmer who knew of Nerevar, and yet spoke his name in hatred or in reverence?</p>
<p>            Why would I be chosen? – why, because the Emperor had chosen me, and forced me into this prophecy as the Empire had forced itself into Morrowind.</p>
<p>            Born on a certain day, to uncertain parents; devoted through sheer blind curiosity; now, here, doubting herself, outside the very cavern which would decide my fate. Would decide, once and for all, if I was truly chosen: or if Azura would see me as the colonial imposter which I was – see me as such, as the Ashlanders already saw me – and would reject me.</p>
<p>            And then what?</p>
<p>            It had gone into legend, and almost into myth, that there had been Incarnates before – failed Incarnates, rejected for their unsuitability, killed for their audacity. It was a matter of contention within me, why this particular point had not been mentioned to me. Either it was a false datum, which I had read in an unreliable book; or it was true, and I had not been told because – well, because if I knew I might die, I might not be so willing to go through with the quest.</p>
<p>            I might die, then...</p>
<p>            Caius had not wanted me to die: had been most insistent that I live. <em>You are lucky to be alive</em>, he had said, <em>and I am determined to ensure that you remain that way</em>. Had he known about the failed Incarnates?</p>
<p>            I would not have remembered the failed Incarnates, this small thought which grew to unreasonable size in my anxious mind, if I had not had such a space to think...</p>
<p>            I stood, cleared my head, breathed the soft ashy air; looked west, over the hills, to the sun. It was still high, too high; I paced forth, paced back, looked upon the door again, and at length sat down once more.</p>
<p>            What if I should live, and not be the Nerevarine?</p>
<p>            Then Morrowind would be consumed by the Blight, overtaken by the forces under Red Mountain, fall to Dagoth Ur...</p>
<p>            It would not be my fault, nor anyone’s. If I was not the Nerevarine, then nobody at this time was. And if I was not the Nerevarine, that was nobody’s fault, if not the Empire’s.</p>
<p>            It would be a tragedy, certainly –</p>
<p>            It felt as if I could not win: I was so certain, sitting there, that I was not the Nerevarine... Surely I would know, by now? would feel Nerevar’s spirit rising within me? Was that what would happen, in the Cavern of the Incarnate? Surely not! I was a Cyrodiilic Breton, an imperial imposter, Nerevar and I had nothing in common, and I could not inspire anything among a populace who yet despised me.</p>
<p>            Did I <em>want</em> to be the Nerevarine? – it would be preferable to death, if nothing else. – I did not want the glory of it; perhaps I wanted a little of the influence which it might grant me...</p>
<p>            Oh! my mind was quite confused, I could not put my thoughts in order. Here I stood on the threshold of fate, and it was all I could do not to turn back, and reject whatever lay beyond. – Here I was, awaiting the dusk, in turbulence, quite out of myself with perplexion.</p>
<p>            I stood again, traced a circle before the door, looked again to the sun.</p>
<p>            I had wanted the hour to come quickly; now I did not want it to come at all. It was suddenly clear that here my path ended, I was an imposter, and I would be swiftly dealt with, if I went through that door, I would be surely killed.</p>
<p>            And by the gods – if this had been but months ago, I might have taken that risk, if only to prove a point...</p>
<p>            Oh! dying to prove a point! what had I been, all that time ago? and what had I become, of late?</p>
<p>            <em>I cannot die here</em>, I told myself: <em>I cannot! what would become of Ilmeni?</em></p>
<p>            Ilmeni!...</p>
<p>            To my shame, I had not thought on her since leaving the Urshilaku last, had scarcely remembered anything existed beyond the prophecy and the ash-storms and the endless bleak landscapes which presented themselves to me. And now, as if to punish my carelessness, she entered my mind more clearly and more painfully than ever before: her gentle voice, the shining innocence in her eyes, the dark freckles on the nose and the cheeks and the lips which I kissed, over, and over, I had not wanted to leave, had parted with little but the promise that I would be back, a promise which I must keep, lest –</p>
<p>            <em>I cannot die, for I have a promise to Ilmeni, and that is more important than any purpose which the Empire or fate or the gods might have for me.</em></p>
<p>            There is nothing to make time fly, like thinking on one’s passions; when next I stood, and fixed my eyes one final time upon the sun, I saw that the horizon was aglow, that the sun was beyond the mountains, that evening was upon me.</p>
<p>            But, by the gods! if I was to become Nerevar, then was that worse than dying, in defiance of my promise to Ilmeni? would I emerge intact, would I be still Lunette?</p>
<p>            There upon the threshold of fate, and I turned halfway to retreat.</p>
<p>            If I should fail, then – what use was my promise, if Ilmeni would perish in the approaching crisis, if everyone would?</p>
<p>            If I should succeed –</p>
<p>            I was saved from my own thoughts – as I had hoped I should be, hours ago – by the flare of the sun, as it disappeared from view: by a most spectacular flash, almost green; and then the dusk was upon me, the door began to open. – And whether it were by Azura’s will, or my own turbulence, the twilight overwhelmed me, my fate tempted me beyond all reason, and defying all doubt I entered the Cavern of the Incarnate.</p>
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